Proposing a Dedicated Section for Our Keyholders

I’d like to put forward an idea: we should create a dedicated section of the forum specifically for our Keyholders. It doesn’t have to be exclusive, but it would serve as a space where keyholders are the main contributors. Other members could still jump in with questions or answers related to KH topics.

For a while now, I’ve been trying—and failing—to get my KH/spouse to join in on this forum. One of her gripes is that she has to dig through countless threads just to find the handful written by keyholders and containing info relevant to them. It wouldn’t be too much effort for our site admin to gather all the threads featuring keyholder content or authored by us, and move them into a new spot. We others could promise not to clutter up that newly established area. If I can demonstrate that there’s now a space made just for her, it might encourage her to participate—though maybe not immediately. Still, I think it deserves consideration. My proposal for the name of this section is: Keyholder’s Lounge.

Does anyone else have recommendations or thoughts on such an area?

Since I already made this suggestion earlier, it’s only right that I second your proposal. I hope it can evolve into a place where gentle mentoring happens, helping with the 'I’ve put you in charge but I still need to tell you what to do' phase many of us experience by providing outside perspectives. A sub-forum within the Members Lounge should suffice. As Wishful 4 mentioned, we just have to be good and let it grow naturally.

> member_4e3795d05d wrote: > Since I already made this suggestion earlier, it’s only right that I second your proposal. > > **I hope it can evolve into a place where gentle mentoring happens, helping with the **'I’ve put you in charge but I still need to tell you what to do' phase many of us experience by providing outside perspectives.** > > A sub-forum within the Members Lounge should suffice. As Wishful 4 mentioned, we just have to be good and let it grow naturally. I’ll ‘third’ this suggestion too. Although she *took* charge (rather than me simply placing her there), a few days ago when I remarked that she wasn’t getting as much benefit from the dynamic as she perhaps could, she told me I needed to 'teach' her more. I know she wants 'more,' because at times you can see her frustration when applying the power correctly would give her what she desires—but I hesitate to... influence... her choices or actions for fear of coming across as 'topping from the bottom,' making it seem like she’s doing things just because *I* want them done. This leaves me torn: there are certain things I find enjoyable, desirable, even erotic if they happen naturally, or if she acts in a specific way to achieve her goals—but I don’t want my preferences to override hers. For me, the ideal setup would be for her to choose her own path without my input. Unfortunately, though, she lacks some of the knowledge that could help guide her. Adding to this is her reluctance to browse online 'porn,' which could easily offer her plenty of ideas and insights. I’m not sure why she avoids it so much; she clearly enjoys XXX videos. Maybe a 'porn-free' advice corner would suit her... although, if she starts visiting here regularly, well—I’ve been somewhat more open with my thoughts around her than usual—and no doubt she’ll soon recognize my posts. Not certain how she’ll react... though, judging by last night, maybe not too badly, and I could end up in the BCWYWF zone. Actually, thinking about it now, perhaps we should browse together? It makes me slightly uneasy, but since she does like watching videos with me, that might be part of the solution to ease some of her worries/inhibitions.

You’ll need Thupmer’s approval since he’s the admin. The general feeling is that this forum is 'all-inclusive,' and creating special sub-forums might make some people feel left out. I don’t have a strong opinion either way. It does no harm, and there’s no reason why we couldn't just use specific threads for now. Ultimately, it comes down to the site owner.

> member_6a2b8da741 wrote: > The general feeling is that this forum is 'all-inclusive,' and creating special sub-forums might make some people feel left out. On a few other web boards, it became quite absurd. On one site, men were peeking into the 'no peeking - wimmin only' forums, so admins decided to suspend any male accounts that did. Naturally, men started registering as women just so they could look around (not necessarily participate). Then the admins began asking for verification—for what? I’m all for a Keyholder forum where newcomers can swap advice and find support—but I’d hate to see it turn into an exclusive members-only club. For now, until Thumper returns from vacation or wherever he is, maybe we could have a dedicated Keyholder thread in the Members Only section? Maybe Belle or CQ could start it and keep it near the top?

> member_381064b05f wrote: > On a few other web boards, it became quite absurd. I think I know which one she means. It kind of fits the board's name, doesn't it? A Keyholders sub-forum would be handy, much like the 'devices' section is useful. To me personally, it wouldn’t make a huge difference; I just use the 'View unread posts' link anyway, so they’d appear in my feed as usual. But for someone browsing and trying to find info before deciding whether to join, it could definitely help.

> Maybe Belle or CQ could start it and keep it near the top? Belle, would you mind taking care of this? CQ is away on business and hasn’t had much time lately—I’ve only seen her maybe four days in recent weeks!

I’ll get it done here soon!

And once Belle sets it up, the least we can do is point out this new space to our keyholders.

A new thread has been started in the Member's Only section.

> member_0fe7c9ef96 wrote: > > I’ll get it done here soon! Thanks Belle.

> member_6a2b8da741 wrote: > > > I’ll get it done here soon! > Thanks Belle I feel excluded already. I really, *really* want to post in there. Is this what real denial feels like?

> Atone wrote: > > Is this what real denial feels like? Like eating M&M's in front of my two-year-old:D

> member_0fe7c9ef96 wrote: > > Atone wrote: > > Is this what real denial feels like? > Like eating M&M's in front of my two-year-old:D I’m signing up for a new account just so I can post there. My first topic will be gossiping about Atone.

This was borrowed from the 'Hello World!' thread > member_0fe7c9ef96 wrote: > > Preciado wrote: > > Anyway, I was compelled to register because of the keyholder area that Belle created (thanks!). I hope it becomes a place where my wife/KH can learn, share new ideas, and generally continue enjoying her journey. > Thanks for all the guidance so far. You are welcome! Welcome to the forums! If you sign up just to access the Keyholder area (in the members-only forum), make sure at least one of your posts gets approved. Otherwise, your account might get deleted along with the spammers. Periodically Thumper goes through and removes members who have zero posts. Most often they’re just spam accounts; I don’t want you caught up in that.

> member_381064b05f wrote: > I’m signing up for a new account just so I can post there. My first topic will be gossiping about Atone. You know I’m allowed to read it, right? You should keep gossiping about me in the other private forum.

Actually, having men who aren't locked out of the keyholder sub-forum would be ideal, but we know that won’t happen given the reasons already stated. I really appreciate how inclusive these forums are here. However, when couples (like Jnuts and me) both participate, it can sometimes make saying exactly what you mean a bit awkward. So much of **chastity** revolves around communication, and at the start of their journey many people realize they actually communicate very little. Many keyholders would feel more comfortable asking questions or voicing concerns that their men don’t see right away. Now, how to do this without every man signing up with a fake profile just to watch what his KH is saying—that’s the challenge, and I see no easy solution.

> member_0fe7c9ef96 wrote: > A new thread has been started in the Member's Only section. Belle, thank you so much for taking this brave first step. As this area grows, I hope it encourages my KH/spouse to participate.

Image Have YOU told your KH about the new Forum???