My Path Through New Chastity Life

Where do I start? I could begin with last Saturday night, when my wife secured me in our new chastity device. But that would skip over some crucial details leading up to it. Or I could go back to the very beginning of our relationship and explain how we reached this point, though that feels more like a tale for another day. No, for now I think I’ll start sometime last week. It was morning. The exact day escapes me now. Let’s just say it was our single moment of quiet bliss in an otherwise busy and stressful week. On that specific morning, I woke up early. I reached over and cuddled with my wife. She stirred and hugged me back. Soon we were nuzzling and kissing, and before long our hands began to wander, fondling and caressing each other. We both knew where things were headed. We rarely get the chance for morning sex. I got out of bed and went to the door. No sound from the kids’ rooms. I quietly shut and locked our bedroom door and returned to bed, stripping off as I moved. Our now naked bodies pressed together, savoring the intimacy. We resumed kissing and touching. Soon my face was between her thighs, lapping at her pussy. Often in these moments I wonder how the rest of our lovemaking will unfold. Will she let me go down on her until orgasm? If she does, she usually gives me my favorite aftercare: a tease-and-denial handjob, often ending with a ruined orgasm. But no, this morning we both wanted the same thing. I wanted to be inside her, and she wanted me there too. I lifted her legs onto my shoulders and slowly entered her. Our bodies moved together in a delightful rhythm. Usually during sex I have to work hard to avoid climaxing early. I start doing mathematical progressions in my head, picking a number and doubling it repeatedly: 2, 4, 8, 16, 32, 64, 128, 256, 512… The difficulty of the progression roughly matches the effort required to avoid orgasm. But it takes me out of the moment. I can either have the intense closeness with my wife and come quickly, or close off part of my mind and allow my body to give her pleasure. That conflict is why I usually prefer sequential pleasuring rather than simultaneous. On this particular magical morning, none of that was necessary. We both knew we didn’t have much time before the kids woke up, and my wife was approaching her climax quickly. I didn’t need to hold back or pause my movements to keep from coming. And I didn’t need to do math in my head. As her orgasm approached, I quickened my pace and we came together. We probably all carry a mental list of the few perfect moments we experience in our lives. This was one of mine. We basked in the afterglow for a few minutes before the kids got up and life returned to its busy rhythm. With a lingering kiss, my wife headed off to work. The dog was fed and sent out to play in the yard. The kids had breakfast and their lunches were packed. I dropped them at school and went back to working on my novel. I’d like to say that later that same day the new chastity device arrived on our doorstep, but honestly, I’m not sure now. I remember it came earlier in the week than the new lingerie I bought for my wife, even though I ordered those first. The lingerie was something I had meant to order for a while—I just waited until we knew how big this year’s tax refund would be. But the chastity device? I bought that one on a whim. I routinely browse various chastity and cuckolding blogs, indulging in my fantasies that maybe, someday, WE could do those things. On one blog, a woman mentioned ordering a sex toy only to find out later she could have gotten it much cheaper on Amazon. Hmm, I thought. Does Amazon carry chastity devices? I’d been wanting to replace the CB-3000 we broke about a year or two ago but had hesitated due to prices. Money is tight these days. So I checked the CB-6000s on Amazon. And there it was! At almost half off too! That was good enough for me. I ordered it. I should mention that our prior experiments with chastity play were just that—play. A way to tease out my arousal, with the implicit assumption that once I’d been tormented enough, I would get my orgasm. After all, wasn’t it fair? I focus on her and make her come, then it’s my turn. Fairness. Equality. Isn’t that what healthy relationships are built upon? The new device arrives. I take a few minutes to examine it before putting it away in the nightstand. By this point, I’ve read enough about chastity devices to know I should take my time and make any necessary adjustments before putting it on. Besides, I want to do this with my wife present, and there wouldn’t be time until the weekend. I put the device out of mind for now and focus on getting through the rest of the week. It’s stressful. The kids are snipping at each other, and there are lots of chores and activities to track. I manage to remember most of them. Finally, it’s Friday. We have a lovely dinner and get the kids asleep. My wife and I are exhausted. We collapse into bed. It’s still relatively early; we just need to rest and reconnect. We start talking. We talk about sex, our plans for Saturday night, and chastity. It’s a conversation that begins a new chapter in our relationship… I think I’ll stop here for now. This post is already very long. Please let me know if this kind of detailed account is more than people want to read or if you’d rather I just cut to the chase.

Back to Friday evening... My wife and I are lying in bed, discussing our plans for Saturday night. She wants to know: what is our goal with this toy? What are we aiming for? She wants me to manage her expectations so we're on the same page. We have a little discussion on this topic. I don't remember the specifics—they aren't particularly relevant to the outcome—but what we were about to discuss was. We started talking about our likes and dislikes from our last attempt at chastity play. My wife expressed some displeasure with the tit-for-tat feel of our lovemaking. That's when it hit me, and I had my epiphany. She could see something happening inside me and waited until I found words for it. "It's not about me," I tried to explain. "It's not about what I can get after being released from chastity. It's about getting joy from being focused on YOU." I'm sitting here at my computer, trying to reconstruct this conversation and convey how profound this realization was, though I think I might be failing utterly. What I'm trying to say is that I realized it isn't about what happens to my cock after release. To make it work, you have to find joy in the experience of chastity itself. While walking around wearing the device, devoted and attentive to your spouse—you're already at your goal. There's nowhere further to go. Anything else that happens—her taking off the device and playing with her toy—that's all gravy. That only matters if it makes her happy. Because that's what I'm supposed to be focused on. It sounds so simple writing it like that. In fact, I'm sure I've read words to that effect many times before. I read them, understood them intellectually, but I didn't FEEL it. Like zen enlightenment: you either experience it or you don't. I explained all this to my wife. Not in the exact same words I'm using here, but she got the idea. Then she saw the look on my face and asked what was wrong. I told her I just realized what I'm walking into. This isn't a game anymore. For the first time, I am truly ready to surrender control of my sexuality to her. She could lock me in that thing, and there'd be no coming out unless she said so. I wasn't going to complain like I had in the past. As I told her this, my cock grew rock hard. Not at the fantasy, but at the reality. I put her hand on it to show her. My body knew what it wanted. Even if I was scared and craved release later—this is what I really needed. I told her I love her. What's more, I trust her. More than anyone else in my life. I can trust her with this because I know she'll do what's best for me. I don't have to worry or keep score. I'm safe with her. If she denies me, tortures and torments me, she'll do it knowing that I'll be happier that way than being free to orgasm as I please. By now it was getting late and we were both tired. My wife fell asleep quickly. I didn't. Actually, I had a hard time falling asleep. I'm so buzzed by my shift in perspective that I can't relax. My erection continues to throb at the thought of what awaits me tomorrow night. Even though I know intellectually that I won't be in chastity permanently and will have orgasms in my future, a more primal part of my brain imagines that our bout of morning sex earlier in the week might have been my last orgasm. My cock tingles at the thought. Holy shit. Am I really that turned on by the idea of actually going through with this? One nice thing about a penis: it doesn't lie. It knows what it wants. I lay there in bed, stewing in my juices. I finally drifted off to sleep around three or four. I woke up the next morning still buzzed. You'd think I'd feel exhausted, but not this time. I got the kids downstairs and let my wife sleep in. When she woke, I offered to make breakfast. She looked at me funny. Usually on weekends she cooks for me. She knows it means "I love you" when she does so. This time she indulged me, and I cooked. I'm a very good cook; she taught me. She took the kids shopping at the mall. Then I watched them while she went off for a manicure and pedicure. The day moved slowly, and I was enjoying it. I knew what was coming, and I was happy. I'm grateful for those 24 hours between my epiphany and getting locked up. Normally when you do something intense or exciting, your body gets pumped full of adrenaline. You experience both the activity you're engaged in and your excitement about it. The two blend together, making it harder to process the experience clearly. In my case, I experienced the excitement first, on its own, without the activity that prompted it. By the time Saturday night rolled around, I felt focused. Centered. I knew what I was doing and was walking into it with my eyes open. We made sure the kids got to bed early. While my wife finished putting them to sleep, I pulled out my massage table and set it up in our bedroom. My wife came in. I shut and locked the door. She undressed and lay down. Over the next hour, I gave her a full-body massage, taking my time, no rushing. By the time I was done, we no longer felt like parents; now we were lovers. She pulled out one of the pieces of lingerie I ordered and slipped into it. Caveman that I am, the sluttier the better. I ordered a classy piece and a slutty one. She picked the slutty one. Something inside me sang with joy. At her command, I stripped and we sat down together on the bed. We pulled out the chastity device and figured out how to put it on. It's similar to the old one but has some differences. Within moments, I felt it closing around my cock. I realized how much I'd missed having it encased like this. She put the lock on and looked me in the eye as it clicked shut. A small grin played across her lips. She lay back on the bed, and I curled up beside her. We kissed. I ran my lips along her jaw, down to her throat, planting more kisses as I went. I moved from her side to squatting on all fours over her so I could let my mouth travel her body freely. She used her feet to find my trapped cock and began batting at it playfully with her toes, like a cat with a toy. Soon she had her toes in my mouth, and I was sucking on them. I ended up on my back with her feet resting on my chest. She moved them around, sometimes into my mouth, other times pressing gently on my face or throat. This isn't like other times she's topped me. "How did you suddenly get so good at this?" I asked her. There was a shrug in her voice as she answered, "I don't feel like I'm acting out a role anymore. I'm just being me." She rested her feet back on my chest and wondered aloud what it would be like to use me as a footrest while she read. In the past, I would have complained. Boring. But not now. Now it actually sounds appealing. And she wasn't done surprising me this evening. "Those other women, online," she said, "do any of them lock up their husbands and just throw away the key?" Ulp! "Um...I'm sure it must happen, but it's probably very rare." "But the thought turned you on, didn't it?" My cock was straining within its prison at this point. I nodded, speechless. I was almost certain she was just screwing with my head; she wouldn't really do that. Still, just the thought... I sat up, and she slid her big toe into my mouth, thrusting in and out slowly. It slipped out with a "pop," and she laughed. It happened again, and she asked if I was doing it on purpose. I said no; it wasn't what I was thinking of. What was I thinking of? she asked. Hesitantly, I admitted I was fantasizing that I was prepping a lover for her—making him hard to thrust into her while I lay beside her in my little prison. "And that would make you happy?" she asked. "Yes," I said. She asked me why. But first, she fucked my mouth with her toe a bit more before letting me answer. "Because then I could give you everything. A loving husband who adores you—" She cut me off before I could continue. "You adore me?" She actually sounded surprised. "Yes," I said, wondering how she could have missed something so obvious. "Say it. Say it again." "I adore you." She smiled, and I resumed my broken train of thought: "—and you'd have a lover who could pound into you the way you like without having to stop or slow down." I moved to kiss her. She let me for a moment before putting a hand on top of my head and pushing me down between her legs. She was very wet. I slipped two fingers inside her and thrust slowly as my tongue danced across her clit. "Do you like the taste of my juices?" I knew she was teasing me. For the last few weeks of sex, we'd been role-playing succubus and victim. She would intoxicate her prey with addictive, aphrodisiac body fluids and then drain his soul out with his seed—but not before making him beg for it. She was reminding me of those games now. I took my fingers out of her and licked them clean in answer. She decided to roll over onto her belly. She reached over and pulled her magic wand from the nightstand. I knew what she wanted. I positioned the vibrator between her pussy and the bed—actually, on the towel we'd laid out in advance. I turned it on, and she started grinding her pussy into it as I knelt between her spread legs watching her ass writhe back and forth. "Lick my ass," she ordered. I knelt forward and slid my tongue between her buttocks, licking in ever-tightening circles. I tried using my tongue like a cock, penetrating her anus slightly and enjoying her moans. Eventually, my jaw tired, so I sat up and used my fingers on her G-spot. When those got tired, I resumed licking her ass. She hit her climax and buried her face in the pillow. I turned off the vibrator and sat back. She enjoyed being still. Eventually, she stirred and sat up, looking at me. This was normally the point where I'd want attention. Not this time. We cleaned up. I put away the massage table and got into bed. We kissed each other good night, told each other how much we loved one another and what a wonderful time we had. It felt different. Better. Lighter. We turned off the lights and closed our eyes. I was asleep within minutes. More next time.

Huh. Not one response. Well, not much point in baring my soul then. So instead here's the short version of what happened since: I wore the CB6000s from Saturday night to Monday night, for 48 hours. During that time I had little to no discomfort, which still amazes me. When I wore the CB3000, I was in agony within a few hours. My wife and I are enjoying the "horny high" we're both experiencing, aware that what we feel now will need hard work behind it to make this growth in our relationship permanent. We are probably much more cautious in our optimism than comes across in my recounting of past weekend events. My skin started feeling tender toward the end of yesterday's day—not bad, but definitely that warning your body gives you that trouble is coming soon. My wife unlocked me to let the skin heal overnight. I'm not experiencing any soreness today at all, so I'll be locked back in tonight. I have some questions as a result of this weekend's events. I'll be digging around forums and other websites for answers, but since I am a busy parent, I'll list them here in case anyone feels like helping: 1. Is it a mistake to use the "go slow" approach? Will my body face the same hurdle each time I wear the device? If so, is it better just keeping it on and gutting through the discomfort until my body adjusts? 2. Will my body adjust? How long does it take? Do people find that after they've gone, say, one week in chastity, it's clear sailing from then on, or does the time-to-soreness keep moving slowly back? 3. Assuming physical discomfort isn't a problem, are there other times that become challenging? Are there specific psychological or physiological hurdles to clear along the way? 4. Assuming I'm locked up long-term, are any depilatory creams safe for genital hair removal? If so, is there any chance they'd react with the plastic CD? What about with stainless steel if I switch to metal?

I appreciated your initial posts. It seemed a bit unusual for me to jump in since I'm new here, but thanks for sharing.

> member_7e766db0a6 wrote:Huh. Not one response. > 1. Is it a mistake to use the "go slow" approach? Will my body face the same hurdle each time I wear the device? If so, am I better off just keeping it on, gutting my way through the discomfort until my body adjusts? > 2. Will my body adjust? If so, how long does it take? Do people find that after they've gone, say, one week in chastity, it's clear sailing from then on or does the time-to-soreness just keep moving slowly back? > 3. Assuming physical discomfort is not a problem, are there any other times that become challenging? Are there other specific psychological or physiological hurdles that one must clear along the way? > 4. Assuming I'm locked up long term, are there any depilatory creams safe for genital hair removal? If so, is there any chance they'd react with the plastic CD? What about with stainless steel if I switch to metal? Captain, it may look like we have thousands of members here, but most are spammers. Since you've written a lot, people need time to find and digest your eloquent words. That said, let me address some of these questions: 1 & 2 - Personally, I believe giving the body time to adapt is crucial. Your skin needs to stretch in certain areas, sleep cycles will shift gradually, and you'll learn a slightly different approach to hygiene. I suggest starting with a few hours at a time and increasing daily. However, if you know what to expect based on previous devices, push forward faster. 4 - I shave or keep the hair very short because I dislike it getting caught or pinched. Polycarbonate handles Nair, Neet, and similar products well. You might get a burning sensation on your skin though; my sensitive parts don't appreciate that much. 3 - This part is unique to you. Your story suggests you've already made the biggest leap (it reminds me of my own experience from a few years ago). However, be prepared: at some point it may become very difficult, you might regret it, or you'll find yourself fighting against it. That's normal and okay. Just let your wife know in advance that she may need to provide firm guidance and support. Keep communicating so she understands the emotional shift; otherwise, people might just think you're being grumpy.

Hey, I only have nine more posts than you—ten now. I'm a newbie too, so don't hesitate to speak up. Thanks for the reply. Like chastity, sharing that level of personal detail is both fun and scary.

Tom, thanks for the feedback. > 4 - I shave or close trim because I don't like the hair getting caught and pinched. The polycarbonate will resist Nair, Neet, or whatever you're using. You may, however, get a burning reaction on your skin. My wabbly bits don't like it much. Hmm, good to know. I'll give that a try and see how my body reacts. Hopefully, I have better luck. > But be aware that at some point you may find it extremely difficult, you may regret your decision, or you may fight against it. Thanks for the warning. It seems impossible to feel like that right now, but I would have said the same thing a year ago about where I am today.

> member_7e766db0a6 wrote:Huh. Not one response. Wet towel warning here. Move on if you aren't up for it—honestly, I probably shouldn't weigh in on these things anyway. You're a gifted writer. And I've almost replied to you more than once. To be blunt, falling hard for chastity is easy. Words like "journey" are common in posts from those newly introduced to chastity, and many of them flame out due to lack of better terms. Sometimes I wonder if the fervor to profess hides an overriding of conflicted desires. So, I think the veterans here are being judicious about responding. In my short time on this forum, I've seen a few people come in hot and heavy then disappear. You seem to be doing it right, and many men here would envy having such an open-minded partner! Generally, I'd describe this forum as more of an open, frank, even boring exchange about the realities of day-to-day relationships and devices. There are definitely forums that fuel fantasy. But a place like this is a godsend—a safe haven where asking practical questions and getting no-nonsense answers about daily life is invaluable. To reiterate, I'm relatively new here too, so take all this with a grain of salt. > member_7e766db0a6 wrote: > I wore the CB6000s from Saturday night to Monday night, 48 hours. During that time I had little to no discomfort, something I'm still amazed at. When I wore the CB3000 I was in agony within a few hours. My wife and I are enjoying the "horny high" we are both experiencing, aware that what we are feeling in the moment will need to be followed by hard work to make this growth in our relationship permanent. We are probably much more cautious in our optimism than comes across in my recounting of this past weekend's events. Caution is good, as is not overselling it to your partner. I assume many folks here (like me) lean submissive; from personal experience, a subby can easily let his eyes exceed his appetites. IMO, chastity is all about the horny high and how it makes you feel and act, so I think you're approaching it correctly. IMO, plastic devices rarely work well long-term for me (though some do), but they make an excellent introduction and help with learning proper sizing. I made mistakes and had bad luck, but I wouldn't change a thing. For couples, chastity isn't solitary; it's a relationship dynamic. Getting the ground rules right is good. My partner was very understanding about breaks needed for comfort and health reasons (and there's more to that story). If you don't view a break as failure and your SO doesn't either, you're on the right path under the assumption that chastity fits with your relationship. > member_7e766db0a6 wrote: > 1. Is it a mistake to use the "go slow" approach? Will my body face the same hurdle each time I wear the device? If so, am I better off just keeping it on, gutting my way through the discomfort until my body adjusts? IMO, absolutely not! You need to learn which types of discomfort are normal and which mean "OMG, get this off for a few days." How else can you figure that out without trial and error? Err on the side of safety. > member_7e766db0a6 wrote: > 2. Will my body adjust? If so, how long does it take? Do people find that after they've gone, say, one week in chastity, it's clear sailing from then on or does the time-to-soreness just keep moving slowly back? Yes, you'll adjust, though it varies. Sometimes things go wrong all day or overnight and affect you for a while. Other times, excitement lasts too long and tenderness sets in. Some devices you may never fully adapt to; sometimes you need to find one that starts working better over time. Trial and error. > member_7e766db0a6 wrote: > 3. Assuming physical discomfort is not a problem, are there any other times that become challenging? Are there other specific psychological or physiological hurdles that one must clear along the way? I'd say the basic areas of challenge are: - Dealing with long-term denial despite imperfect devices and bodies. - Managing relationship issues that surface as new elements enter your sex life. The specifics depend on you and might warrant their own threads. > member_7e766db0a6 wrote: > 4. Assuming I'm locked up long term, are there any depilatory creams safe for genital hair removal? If so, is there any chance they'd react with the plastic CD? What about with stainless steel if I switch to metal? Brief plug: metal is far superior to plastic—even my current non-custom piece. It's not just grooming; it's cleanliness and odor. In my relationship, my key holder doesn't mind me taking breaks for cleaning and grooming in the shower. Regarding depilatory creams, they can be harsh, so if you get permission for periodic grooming, that might be the easiest route. When I first got locked, I couldn't believe I'd spent decades unlocked—it felt right. But I've had extended breaks for health and relationship reasons, and... it's been okay. The only true right or wrong here is what works for your relationship and mutual satisfaction. As kids, we get gold stars on homework; as adults, we have to award ourselves our own gold stars. Nothing beats getting one from my partner. Life with a companion comes down to the social dynamic: mutual admiration mixed with primal instincts that biology or upbringing has instilled in us, which our partner can tolerate—or hopefully enjoy.

It is a huge milestone if the KH/spouse finally understands that MC and the relationship are about what she wants. Women often focus heavily on what we want from them and go to great lengths to provide it. Getting past this point is no small undertaking. Once they get there, huge strides can be made.

> Huh. Not one response. I didn't think you were fishing for responses. I did reply...but you would have had to be here at the time to see it. Well written and erotic. Don't let a lack of immediate replies stop you; I enjoyed it but lacked the time then, not wanting to interrupt your story's flow.

> Wet towel warning here. Move on if you're not up to that--honestly, I should just not weigh in on such things. No, no. That's exactly what I need. I know how easy it is to get lost in the fantasy, lose perspective, and have the dream crash down. I want this to work. In my first two posts, I was indulging my joy at our progress—a brief moment of exultation reaching a mountaintop. But now we must continue on the trail; where does it lead? To yet another mountain. So yes, I know the hard work begins now. Not all my storytelling-style posts will be as passionate as the initial ones, but they'll be honest. > Words like "journey" are pretty common in missives from folks newly introduced into chastity Yeah, I can see that. I almost titled the thread "And so it begins..." but worried few would catch the Babylon 5 reference. I'm okay with "journey." It's much like a priest or rabbi calling your marriage a journey while officiating: a time for joy and celebration, yet also a commitment to face challenges together. > Sometimes I wonder if the fervor to profess belies an override of conflicted desires. Funny—you were just thinking along those lines last night. We all have conflicting desires. For me, I can give in to my physical desire for sex and still feel unsatisfied psychologically or spiritually, or accept my submission to my wife and relinquish free access. Since I've long felt unhappy with the former, I think I'm ready to embrace the latter. Time will tell. I plan to keep sharing experiences, though this week is crazy so timing is tricky. A friend visits today from out of state, then my wife and I vacation with others over the weekend. Very busy. BTW, my wife has joined using "imalmostalwaysright," which describes her eerily well. She plans to post in the keyholder's thread, but considering she's busier than me, who knows when that will be.

> Didn't think you were fishing for responses. Almost forgot to address this. Yes, my insecurities showed a bit. I'm normally very private, so opening up like that is significant for me. The internet's (hopefully) reliable anonymity certainly helps. I wasn't looking for adulation or attention-hungry star treatment showered with roses. It was more about wanting reassurance of being accepted and understood. Someday I'll recount how I got into BDSM, detailing all the mistakes made while stripping away society's preconceptions of who I should be.

> member_7e766db0a6 wrote: > Almost forgot to address this. Yes, I guess my insecurities were showing a little. I'm normally a very private person, so opening up like that is a big deal for me. The, hopefully reliable, anonymity of the internet certainly helps. > > I'm not looking for the adulation of the crowd or anything, like some attention hungry star looking to be showered with roses. It was more a matter of wanting the reassurance of being accepted and understood. At some point I'll have to recount how I got into BDSM, and all the mistakes I made along the way as I stripped away society's preconceptions of who I was supposed to be. No problem, I understand completely. Interesting that you mention recounting 'how' you 'got into BDSM'. I've been thinking the same thing myself and pondered starting a thread to see what factors influenced various members (pun not originally intended:mrgreen: ). For me, I have vivid memories of something influential from when I was too young to grasp its full ramifications.

I thought I wouldn't have time for another post this week. One perk of MC is waking up early, giving me a few extra minutes. Nothing hot this time, just practical concerns. Saturday night in, Monday night out—48 hours total. Day one pain was zero, occasionally hitting 1 if I moved or sat wrong. Day two started at baseline discomfort of 1, climbing to 2 only when moving/sitting incorrectly. As the day progressed, discomfort dropped back to level 1. To be safe, we took it off that night for my skin to rest. We planned to put it back Tuesday after a 24-hour break, but examining my scrotum revealed raw skin from the bottom half of the base ring rubbing against me. I was surprised since this didn't hurt nearly as much as with the CB3000. It was tender and dry skin flaked off the edges, so we waited another 24 hours. Re-examined last night; it looked better—slightly pink but intact. I went back in and slept comfortably. Note: I apply Lubriderm generously at regular intervals (not a fan of silicone). I woke up with typical denied morning wood pain. A bit more Lubriderm settled things down. Current discomfort is about 1; doing fine. However, I don't think I'll aim for another 48 hours this time. I feel like I'm pushing slightly too hard. Maybe trying 24 in, 24 out—same total chastity time but broken into smaller shifts. I believe the discomfort is normal and not a sizing issue with the CB6000s. Would appreciate more opinions though. My base ring has an internal diameter of 1.75 inches with the smallest spacer. With cock rings of that size, my testicles would pop out when tying shoes, so I think this part is fine. The spacer gives me less certainty, but as it's the primary secures everything, I'm reluctant to go bigger. Overall, the device fits better than the CB3000. In a flaccid state, my cock either fills the tube perfectly or retracts about a centimeter from the end and slides back easily for urination by pressing firmly against my body. Psychologically, it's been interesting. Even without the cage on mentally, I've coasted in the same headspace, though relief came when putting it back. People are stirring upstairs; more next time...

Check for rough spots on the ring. I had a solid ring for my CB3000 that needed sanding and polishing because it irritated just as you describe. I've become quite fond of hand lotion over other lubes, but less is more if possible; using too much prevents the skin from toughening up naturally.

> I had a solid ring for my CB3000 that needed to be sanded down and polished because it irritated like you describe. I know diddly squat about sanding and polishing. Can you give me a primer on what grades of sandpaper to use, what to use for polishing, tips/technique, etc.? I can't tell you how much I appreciate having a community for advice and support. Thank you.

> Atone wrote:I have become a big fan of using hand lotion instead of other lubes but I still find using less (only what is necessary) is better. Concur.

> member_7e766db0a6 wrote: > I know diddly squat about sanding and polishing. Can you give me a primer on what grades of sandpaper to use, what to use for polishing, tips/technique, etc.? > I can't tell you how much I appreciate having a community for advice and support. Thank you. I used my dremel tool to polish it using a cloth wheel and buffing compound. I probably used the dremel to sand it too but don't remember for sure.

"Be careful what you wish for..." Those were the words my wife said to me as she locked me back up this past Sunday night. She knows just what to say to push my buttons and has been taking great delight in playing teasing mind games with me. But I'm getting ahead of myself. There's some hot sex to share this time, after a little catch-up. Well, maybe more than a little. Bear with me. I haven't had an orgasm since that lovely bout of morning sex I wrote about previously, which occurred - a week and a half ago, I think. In addition to adapting physically to the chastity device I have found myself adjusting mentally as well. Even when I'm not in any discomfort I'm always aware of the device. I find myself in a continual state of low level arousal, like a quiet background hum. It's a sensation I'm finding extremely pleasant. Even the occasional ache hasn't been bothersome. I find it provides me with a sort of mental focus. I feel sharper, more alert and surprisingly, more calm. There's a phenomenon that happens to human beings, maybe to animals too, when their diet is just below the level needed to feel sated. The body goes into a heightened state, I guess you could call it a kind of "hunter mode", in order to optimize the chances of securing prey. I've been wondering if the denial of orgasms produces the same response. Maybe the body is incapable of distinguishing one kind of hunger from the other? Whatever the cause, I like what it does to me. I find myself being far more attentive to my wife, more patient with my children and far less angry when things don't go my way. There is an argument I've come across about these reactions that questions why we men can't be like this without being locked up. And no doubt there is room for some debate on that point. But let me toss out a counter-argument. We human beings do things all the time to adjust our moods and behaviors. We may use coffee to get going in the morning, exercise and lose weight in order to boost our energy, or take anti-depressants to adjust our moods. The fact is we do things all the time to help modulate our behavior. What material we read or view, the people and environments we surround ourselves with all make a difference. So it really isn't surprising that using something to help regulate our sexual needs has a profound effect on our behavior as well. It isn't cheating. No more than someone wearing a religious symbol is cheating by reminding themselves of the code of conduct they have set for themselves. Or a wedding band. Symbols have power for people. And a chastity device is, among other things, definitely a symbol. One that gives a very direct and constant reminder of the commitment one has made. The important thing is this: wearing a chastity device is a deliberate and conscious choice. It is just as real and voluntary a statement as putting on a wedding ring and binding yourself to another person. In either case you still have the power to break your commitment should you so choose. All claims of devices being escape proof to the contrary, the real cage you're making is in your own head. The chastity device is merely an outward reminder. Okay, enough navel gazing. I'm sure most of you are more interested in the naughty bits. I wore the chastity device for 24 hours, from Wednesday to Thursday of last week before removing it for the weekend. My wife and I went on a short vacation in Northern New England with some very close friends. This has been the first trip since our honeymoon without children along. The couple who watched them for us are also good friends - we take turns having our kids and theirs sleep over at each other's homes regularly so that each couple can get a break. But this was the first time that we've tried it for over 24 hours and with an actual trip. Anyway, the vacation was delightful. Saturday morning my wife woke me by stroking my cock through my pajamas. She tickled the sensitive area under the head with her fingertips, stroked the shaft with her palm, then flicked her fingers up and down the shaft like a miniature riding crop. Not for very long, though. Just enough to get me squirming and moaning softly. Just as the sensations were growing intense enough to make my breath catch, she stopped. We got up and spent the rest of the day relaxing with our friends. Cooking breakfast together, lunching at a fine restaurant, and then taking in a movie. After that it was back to our friend's vacation home for a barbecued steak dinner and conversation. One couple announced their first pregnancy. A card game and another movie later and the night was over. Sunday morning I woke up first. This time it was my turn to wake my wife. Even when I'm not wearing the device, our love-making has become a much more sensual affair. Before I could do more than spend a few minutes caressing her she rolled me onto my side and spooned me from behind. She reached around and once again grabbed my cock through my pajamas. She gave it the same treatment as before, only this time finishing by stroking my shaft up and down very fast, only stopping with my first audible gasp. We stopped long enough for me to catch my breath and for a quick brushing of teeth (this is reality here, not fantasy). My mouth lingered at her lips a while before slowly working its way along her neck, to her breasts, and then between her parted thighs. The one challenge was bringing her to orgasm without either of us making enough noise to alert our friends in their adjacent rooms. But we did it. We had one more communal breakfast together before we all packed up our things and headed out, cramming ourselves into two cars and carpooling home. Just before entering our home state we pulled into a large liquor store for bathroom breaks and tax free alcohol. We all roamed the aisles separately. At one point my wife strolled past me and nonchalantly said, "when we get home I'm going to stroke your cock until I get one drop of cum. Then you're going back in your cage." She didn't wait for a response, just continued casually strolling through the store. All of a sudden getting home became much more urgent. Butterflies of anticipation bounced around in my belly for the remainder of the trip. We got home and said goodbye to our friends. We still had two hours before we had to go get our kids. We had the house to ourselves. My wife had already showered that morning, but I needed one. So while she relaxed I went and got cleaned up, making sure to shave off the stubble I'd allowed to grow around my privates while we were away. We cuddled naked on the bed and took our time exploring and touching each other's bodies. Just getting to do this in daylight is a novelty these days. I asked here what she wanted, to which she replied, "the usual" and pulled out the magic wand. "The usual" is probably a bit of a misnomer. She actually gets onto a particular kick for a period of time before deciding to switch to something else. For now "the usual" is her on her belly grinding herself against the vibrator. Other times its been us fucking doggy-style, or me using a rabbit pearl vibrator on her while she squirms against its movements with enough force to make the motor whine. I lay a towel under her hips and position the vibrator. I turn it on and her hips begin their gyrations. Slowly, tentatively at first but growing stronger with steadily building arousal. I kneel between her legs and once again plant my tongue against her tight little asshole. I lap at it a little more aggressively this time. She's really squirming now. It's funny how you can repeat the same actions but notice different things at different times. This time what drew my attention was how her buttocks closed on my face each time she clenched her muscles. As her arousal built her ass tightened, enveloping my face in two delicious globes of flesh. In those moments I couldn't breath, I couldn't see. All I could do was feel and taste her. She came very fast. I guess I wasn't the only one feeling pent up desire. Most of the time my wife feels like she has to stifle her orgasms when the kids are around. She can get pretty loud when she lets herself go. This time she didn't have to hold back. And I got to ride her shuddering hips with my lips all the way to the finish. As she lay there spent I moved up until I was holding myself over her. My cock dangled just above her now well lubricated ass. "May I?" I asked. She gave a low moan which I took as assent and lowered the weight of my body onto her. My cock came to rest between her ass cheeks. After lying still like that for a little bit she rocked her hips up and down a few times, giving my shaft a few strokes. I shifted slightly and my cock slipped out from between her ass cheeks, and now angled down toward the bed, its upper surface pressed against but not penetrating the wet slit of her pussy. She continued moving her hips a little longer, feeding my hunger to be inside her. Small sounds of amusement escaped her lips. "That's enough," she said, coming to a stop. "Up on your knees." I rose up onto my knees by the foot of the bed, but I must have moved stiffly or winced because she remembered one of my knees was giving me trouble and had me lie back instead. She sat cross-legged between my parted legs, letting them wrap around her hips. And then she began stroking me. "Remember," she said, "I'm only going to milk one drop of cum out of you. Then you get locked back up." She began stroking my cock in earnest. "I wonder if I can get my drop without using lube," she mused. I'm a bit lucky here in that, unlike many men, I don't generally leak pre-cum. I have to be just shy of orgasm for anything to leak out, so I knew I was in for a ride. I should also mention that my wife *really *knows how to use her hands. It didn't take her long to make my body dance uncontrollably to her rhythm. Sometimes she stroked fast, sometimes slow. Sometimes with a feather-light touch and other times tightly. Occasionally she pulls the flesh of my cock taut with one hand at the base while she moves the other. She slaps my balls back and forth, or up against my body. Every once and a while she'd point my shaft towards my feet and run her fingers or palms over the sensitive tissue on top of the head. I had to grip the rail of the footboard with both hands to keep from involuntarily squirming away. I'm watching her as she does all this, making eye contact. I have had a tendency in the past to close my eyes in these moments and lose myself in fantasies of femme fatales who provide ecstasy with a terrible price. Like the succubus fantasies, the demoness who gives unearthly pleasure at the cost of one's life. Or being a prisoner on an island of amazons and being milked along with other men at their annual feast. Whoever comes first becomes dinner (Okay, that one is rather dark. Enough to disturb my wife. For me the scene always fades to black before the icky stuff happens). But now, as I look at her, I realize she has found a way to make the fantasy real. I have to resist orgasm. Not because of some fictional horrific end, but because now there is a very real price. The moment I lose myself in the pleasure she will stop touching me and I'll go back in my cage. I think it's the most erotic, most exciting moment of my life. My cock is harder and more engorged than it's been in a decade. Maybe two. I can't keep my eyes off her. I tell her what she's doing to me. How much I love her. She smiles. Every once and a while she stops, teasing me. "Is that a drop of cum I see? No. Not yet." She reaches for the lube. "You've managed to avoid cumming so far. I'm impressed," she says. So am I. It wasn't easy. She has a wicked gleam in her eyes as she slathers my cock in Astroglide. She knows how it amplifies her touch. "There's no resisting now," she teases, "you'll be dripping for me soon." She resumes her stroking and puts me through the roof. My higher cognitive functions begin to shut down as her fingers dance across my flesh, playing a symphony on my nerve endings. I begin to babble incoherently. I can't remember half of it now, but I go on about wanting to be denied orgasms forever, to be her property for the rest of my life. How I can't wait to renew our vows in another year. How I'd remarry her every year if I could. She owns every inch of me. And soon, far sooner than I'd like, I can feel something boiling inside me. That inevitable slide toward release begins. I try as hard as I can to hold it back, but like a roller coaster beginning to drop I can feel myself accelerating to the end. My cum is moving inside me. I can actually feel it travel the length of my cock. I let out a long, low moan as a few drops of milky liquid make their way out of my body and dribble onto my belly. And in that moment, as she promised, she lets go and the ride is over. It's not even a ruined orgasm. I didn't have an ejaculation. No rhythmic pulsing contractions as I spurt into empty air. No, nothing but the first dribble, a brush with ecstasy and it's over. A perfect moment. The pleasure and the frustration course through me. I ride the wave of sensation, unresisting. Physically and emotionally, I've never felt better. We lie in the bed together as I cool off and lose my erection. We put the chastity device back on. It takes a little extra effort this time. As she clicks the lock shut, and with a deliciously wicked smile, she says the words that send a shiver down my spine: "Be careful what you wish for..."

It's been a mostly challenging week, but now that I've reached the end of it things are looking up. After a very pleasant vacation which ended on a high note, my wife and I were unceremoniously dumped back into the real world. She was hit with a huge pile of work that kept her in the office late for most of the week and for some reason our kids decided now was a good time to repeatedly piss each other off, casting yours truly in the role of the United Nations in some never-ending Third World conflict. Joy, O' joy. In my previous posts I had talked about the greater sense of calm and peace I've been feeling. I should point out that even as I experienced these feelings, another portion of my mind has watched my responses dispassionately, questioning their permanence. "Be careful," I say to myself, "this could all be the endorphin rush of something new. It might not be real." But at the same time, it was what I was experiencing at the time, so I allowed myself to enjoy it and document it here accordingly. Not acknowledging those feelings seemed just as self-deceiving as blindly embracing them. So now that I had a bumpy week, what do I think about these feelings? Well, they didn't completely disappear. What is apparent is that I have a greater reserve to draw upon in times of stress, but by no means am I immune to it. No big surprise there, really. Maybe it is an endorphin response which will continue to fade with time. Or maybe I have a greater ability to cope simply because I'm happier living this way. Time will tell. Anyone else have any experience with this long term? Does the well-being fade, or does it last? I've been wearing the CB6000S for longer periods than I had expected this week. I went back in Sunday night for 24 hours. When we removed it Monday night the skin was a little raw but not as bad as the week before. Tuesday night I went back in, expecting to be out Wednesday night. This was also the first week I've worn jeans with the device. Up to now the weather's been nice enough for me to get away with loose fitting cargo shorts. It was a slightly tougher experience in the jeans. Not necessarily more painful, but more difficult to find a comfortable position. I think I'm going to have to go shopping for some new jeans with a little more room around the crotch. So considering the slightly rougher experience with the jeans and the fact that we'd planned to go slow, I expected to be unlocked Wednesday night. By the time the evening rolled around, however, I realized that I wasn't in any discomfort. We decided to leave it on until morning and see what happened. Thursday morning I woke up to the usual discomfort of a morning erection but didn't have any problems after it settled down. It was a hectic morning and my wife left without unlocking me. She had forgotten in her rush to get out the door and I felt comfortable enough in the device to try going for 48 hours. This is when the tone of our week improved. We had I had hoped for some close moments earlier in the week, but it didn't happen. By Thursday afternoon, when I checked on her, my wife's mood was better and she wasn't as exhausted. "Maybe you can give me another drop tonight," she mentioned. That suited me fine. I managed to switch back into shorts for the rest of the day and felt much more at ease. There were moments while standing in the kitchen washing dishes when I completely lost track of wearing the device. It still amazes me. Is this adjustment phase normal? As noted, Thursday was the turning point. The children went to bed on schedule, we walked the dog, and my wife and I had the night to ourselves. To avoid being dull, most of what occurred mirrored my earlier posts. I gave her a thorough massage, which led into "the usual routine." Things shifted slightly after she finished. I was resting on the bed beside her. We took off the device and placed it in the bedside drawer. Lying flat, she leaned against my left side and pinned my leg between hers. She began stroking my penis with one hand while supporting her head with the other, keeping eye contact. "Are you really just going to milk out a single drop?" I asked, mostly wanting to hear it from her lips. "Naturally," she replied. "Did you think I might change my tune?" I hadn't thought so, and she knew that too. She realized I simply wanted confirmation and offered a smile. "Perhaps this time I can get the drop quicker," she said while continuing to stroke me. "I just need to hit your sweet spots." "My sweet spots?" I queried. "You mean tell you exactly where they are?" Part of me craved an excuse to list everything I wish she'd do, while another part hoped nothing would speed up the process. She hadn't even used lubricant yet. Hopefully, this lasts. "Foolish," she answered. "I already know all your sweet spots." The hand supporting her head dropped down, firmly covering my mouth and nose. Darn it. Of course she knows them; I've rambled on about them in the past when our intimacy was struggling. Any sense of control I held slipped away quickly. Within seconds, things were out of my hands as my hips began to thrust. The orgasm surged forward uncontrollably. Best part? I enjoyed it completely. Even though it happened fast, her claim over my sexuality delighted me more than the physical sensation itself. She noticed I had passed the point of no return and stopped pumping, just holding the base steady so it pointed upward. A single jet of semen landed on my stomach. It wasn't quite a full orgasm this time either, but certainly more than one drop. "Look at what you've done!" she exclaimed with pretend irritation. She released me, gathered up the fluid and brought it to my lips. "Someone needs to tidy that up now." Like I said, things are definitely improving.

"I also found your writing and the responses engaging. I’m buying a CB6000S for my husband, so I look forward to locking him up shortly. As a woman, I find it difficult to stop caring for everyone else. My husband has been quite attentive lately, which I am thoroughly enjoying, yet I still feel compelled to do things for him. So, I’m learning simply to enjoy the attention.

"deepj15, thank you for your kind reply. Apologies for not responding sooner; while I check the forums daily, I don’t get many chances to write thoughtful replies. Regarding the dynamic with your husband, remember that if this arrangement makes him happy, then you ARE 'doing for him.' Sometimes doing nothing is the best action. Good luck.

"I stopped my recounting of last week's events on Thursday night since it seemed dramatically appropriate to do so, even though my original plan was to finish with the rest of the week. So to continue, I slept without the device Thursday night. My wife left early Friday morning. The skin looked and felt sufficiently recovered that I locked myself back in, feeling a little uncertain as I did so. This was the first time I had been locked up without my wife's involvement and I felt a little uncertain if this was okay. The last thing I wanted to do was screw up our new dynamic. I called her from the road a little later and confirmed that she didn't mind as long as I was comfortable. Phew. I ended up wearing it through a wedding we attended Saturday. I was a little nervous dancing with it on. I kept having visions of the seam splitting and the thing tumbling down my pants leg and onto the floor. I've started thinking about what I want in a metal device, just for the peace of mind. Saturday night my wife unlocked me to give the skin a rest. In addition to the wedding, my kids had birthday parties to attend so it was a busier weekend than I prefer. Also, Mother's Day, so I took the kids out of the house for several hours and gave her a long, relaxing break. All through the weekend, my wife kept hinting that we might have some fun Sunday night. She didn't say anything outright, more the wink-and-a-nod treatment. So, all excited, I made sure everything was squared away for us to grab some private time. I shower and enter the bedroom, locking the door behind me. My wife has me kneel up on the bed. She examines my cock and balls. "Hardly anything at all," she says, referring to the wear and tear on my skin. "Okay," she says then, "lock it up." I think I did a double take at that point. If this scene had a soundtrack, this is where the music would suddenly stop with the sound of a needle scratching vinyl. What did she just say?! She smiled at my dumbfounded look. "You thought I was going to play with you, didn't you?" Yes, yes I did, I think to myself as I pull the chastity device out. I realize and appreciate what she's doing, but it's taking my body some time to catch up. I have to work to reign in my lust. We talk about it as I set up the massage table and give her another long, slow massage. She admitted to some hesitancy in her decision not to play with me. It gave me the opportunity to say, "You know, screw this. I want you to touch my cock." She took a risk, wanting to see what I'd do. To see if I was serious about what we're doing or would I snap the first time I didn't get what I wanted. And although my lizard brain was yelling at me, wanting to be pleasured, the rest of me was overjoyed at this step. I felt that we had both accomplished something special. If she hadn't challenged me, it wouldn't be real control. We finish the massage and get into bed. I ask her if she wants any attention. My hunger to go down on her has been growing daily and she hasn't giving me the opportunity since we started this new phase of our marriage. It's starting to drive me nuts. But no, she says, she's tired and not in that kind of mood. And that wraps up the weekend. We go to sleep, get up this morning and dive into our weekly routines. I'm still locked up and fairly comfortable. I did, however, just get a text from my wife which I will write here verbatim: "I'm wearing boy short undies because NONE OF MY OTHER ONES ARE WASHED. They are crawling up my ass. While you may enjoy that image, I can assure u the toll I will exact this eve will be challenging. Mwahahahaha" Oops. I knew I forgot to do something.",

"Life smacked us upside the head yesterday. My wife unexpectedly needed surgery. Nothing life threatening, but she'd been experiencing a slowly growing pain that involved some work to fix. I don't want to go into any further detail than that for privacy's sake, but she's doing fine and coming home today. She won't be going back to work for at least a week, so maybe she'll share more details if she wants as now she'll actually have some time to post. I haven't written this week because when I last left things my wife had promised to make me regret leaving her without clean, comfortable underwear Monday morning. And she did. It was quick, unpleasant, and thoroughly humiliating. Something that was well within the bounds of our relationship but something I find myself too embarrassed to recount. So I won't. I wrestled with that decision all week since my goal was to openly share my thoughts, feelings and experiences here. I'll try and write up what I remember of the rest of the week when I have a chance, but not right now. I want to get her home safe and sound first.",

> I haven't written this week because when I last left things my wife had promised to make me regret leaving her without clean, comfortable underwear Monday morning. And she did. It was quick, unpleasant, and thoroughly humiliating. Something that was well within the bounds of our relationship but something I find myself too embarrassed to recount. So I won't. Awwww, crap. Now you're just teasing us, and very cruelly.

"start a blog?"

> member_1f353e1d87 wrote: > > I haven't written this week because when I last left things my wife had promised to make me regret leaving her without clean, comfortable underwear Monday morning. And she did. It was quick, unpleasant, and thoroughly humiliating. Something that was well within the bounds of our relationship but something I find myself too embarrassed to recount. So I won't. > Awwww, crap. Now you're just teasing us, and very cruelly. I really don't mean to. Maybe I'll be ready to talk about it at some point. The feeling of talking into the ether and barely getting a response back is gradually making me more reticent to share. This is extremely personal stuff we're talking about here. I guess when I started this I was expecting some sort of conversation to occur. A bit of "I know how you feel..." or "Back when my wife and I started..." and so on. It's easy to feel alone in all this. After all, besides your partner, who else in your life are you going to talk to about this stuff? I guess I thought there would be more feedback, advice, questions, whatever. The fact that my wife goes into the hospital and no one even bothers to say, "I hope she feels better," is kind of unsettling. Maybe my expectations were off. Maybe most readers think I'm making this stuff up. I'm not really sure. > start a blog? I've considered it. Is this forum the wrong place for the kind of account I'm providing? I'm leaning against starting a blog because I was more interested in a conversation than just airing the details of my private life. I don't feel an inherent need to do so.

"Sometimes the 'back and forth' is there, sometimes it isn't. As for your wife, you already said she was 'doing fine', which to me translates as 'feeling better'- no need to 'hope' if it's already a fact, right? And you didn't want to go into details so I left it alone. The 'teasing' comment- just poking a little good-natured fun. There's no need to get upset, that *is* part of the back and forth that you say you're looking for. I, for one, try not to hijack someone else's thread (not always successfully) with my own addition of "Well, I..." when someone is telling their own story.",

> Sometimes the 'back and forth' is there, sometimes it isn't. As for your wife, you already said she was 'doing fine', which to me translates as 'feeling better'- no need to 'hope' if it's already a fact, right? And you didn't want to go into details so I left it alone. > The 'teasing' comment- just poking a little good-natured fun. There's no need to get upset, that *is* part of the back and forth that you say you're looking for. I, for one, try not to hijack someone else's thread (not always successfully) with my own addition of "Well, I..." when someone is telling their own story. Yeah, you make good points. I think I'm dealing with more stress from my wife's operation than I realized. Even though she is doing remarkably well, it was hard seeing her in pain with nothing I could do to help. And going to sleep alone with her in the hospital recovering from surgery Friday night just felt very, very wrong. Expect more from me soon.

I'm sorry to hear that your wife's situation is causing you so much stress. I am glad that she is doing well and hope that both of you soon recover fully. I can relate to the experience of having to leave my wife (and even kids) in the hospital. It is an amazingly empty feeling. I cannot speak for any others but I am cautious in getting too involved with someone on an Internet forum. I am reluctant to invest too much in a deeper relationship because it may disappear at any time. I have had it happen before and try to avoid it. I am interested in your journey and will continue to follow it as long as you keep updating.

At my request Tom Allen was kind enough to duplicate my thread in the new Journey forum. I will continue posting from there.

I know that you have missed more feedback regarding your blog. Your story is a great mixture of both the physical and psychological sides of MC. I look forward to future updates.