Not Sure How To Handle This Issue

Mrs. GH and I have been at this for a while now, and we both really love it. There’s one thing, though, that’s causing trouble. I have this really bad habit of… Well I guess the best word to use is that I find myself being a pest. Mrs. GH has no problem with me occasionally telling her how frustrated I am or how badly I want her, but sometimes I just get carried away. It’s like I can’t stop myself.

I also find myself frequently coming into her office and standing by her chair just kind of hovering around her. Sometimes there’s a legit reason like if she called me in to see something she found on the internet. Other times I come un-invited to see what she’s up to, ask a question, etc and just end up kind of not wanting to leave. I’m sure it’s some kind of low-grade attempt to get attention and I know I shouldn’t be doing it, but it happens without me even really thinking about it until I realize Mrs. is getting frustrated with me and by then its too late.

It’s usually worst at the beginning of a lock-up especially if it follows a nice long period of being spoiled by being out and having lots of sex. I don’t know if it’s just that it takes me a while to get to that subby place where all is right with the world or what.

Lately we’ve added swats to our routine and Mrs. kindly offered to “beat it out of me”. I’m not sure if that was tongue-in-cheek or not.:? We also talked about starting to do some daily discipline. Nothing heavy duty - just something simple to help me keep my head in the right place. One of the ideas we were talking about yesterday was starting out with some daily “corner time”. I’d be interested to hear other ideas along those lines from real people. I tried doing a little googling but most of what comes up is just your typical crap from some lonely guy’s fantasy world.

I’d be interested to hear how others cope with this problem. I’m sure we can’t be the only couple dealing with it.:)

> member_6ba4cd8d81 wrote: > and Mrs. kindly offered to "beat it out of me". I would take her up on this. Of course I would become more of a pest. It might work for a little while but I would be back.

At this stage I don't believe I "hover" over my wife but I do have periods, be it the beginning, middle or end of a lengthy lock up that I am just "in her face". I want to show her that I am still very sexually attracted to her. We did decide on a word she uses when she definitely wants me to "stand down". It's from a syndicated corny TV dating show we sometimes watch called "Excused". Those times I'm feeling the need to satisfy her and she just doesn't want anything to do with me she simply looks at me as says "You're Excused". It's like her safe word and my cue to back off or suffer the consequences (if you know what I mean). So I fall back, regroup and plan my attack for another day.:lol:

> member_56a3d51043 wrote: > "You're Excused". It's like her safe word and my cue to back off or suffer the consequences (if you know what I mean). Not familiar with the show but I think I might try to steal this.

> Atone wrote: > > member_56a3d51043 wrote: > > "You're Excused". It's like her safe word and my cue to back off or suffer the consequences (if you know what I mean). > > Not familiar with the show but I think I might try to steal this. Works well for us. Here's a link to the show: Like I said it's kinda corny but the show's host is hot and pretty funny. Basically it's another reality dating show which they go through a series of dates trying to match couples. When it doesn't work out then somebody is getting "Excused”: lol: We watch because it's pretty funny.

> member_56a3d51043 wrote: ...Those times I'm feeling the need to satisfy her and she just doesn't want anything to do with me she simply looks at me as says "You're Excused". It's like her safe word and my cue to back off or suffer the consequences (if you know what I mean). So I fall back, regroup and plan my attack for another day.:lol: For what ever reason I sometimes have such a hard time getting it into my thick head (her wording) that she does not want to have sex. How can she not want to have sex all the time???:lol: Subtle hints just doesnt work sometimes, maybe my wife too needs a safe word:

Seriously, I think the safe word is a good suggestion, to me it sounds a lot better than a beating! I can relate to what you say about hovering her and being all over her, my wife likes the extra attention and just rolls with it and has a bit of fun

> member_6e94d145de wrote: > I can relate to what you say about hovering her and being all over her, my wife likes the extra attention and just rolls with it and has a bit of fun :roll: hmmm...:) Of course I really like the extra attention, but sometimes I also feel like a magnet with two kids and one husband stuck to me with glue... I think a safe word actually is needed:)

> member_56a3d51043 wrote: > At this stage I don't believe I "hover" over my wife but I do have periods, be it the beginning, middle or end of a lengthy lock up that I am just "in her face". I want to show her that I am still very sexually attracted to her. > > We did decide on a word she uses when she definitely wants me to "stand down". It's from a syndicated corny TV dating show we sometimes watch called "Excused". Those times I'm feeling the need to satisfy her and she just doesn't want anything to do with me she simply looks at me as says "You're Excused". It's like her safe word and my cue to back off or suffer the consequences (if you know what I mean). So I fall back, regroup and plan my attack for another day.:lol: I just get "Dismissed" end of...

I have found that some women like hearing about the suffering, while others find it whiny and annoying. If she doesn't like it, and based on what kind of kinky dynamic you have - I'm sure there are ways out there that she could punish you and discourage you from bothering her about it. I had to really learn not to whine with my wife. She found it really annoying, and when I analyzed why I was doing it, I realized for me that it helped me to believe that the control and domination was more real. But since she didn't like it, I learned in time to stop it. As I wanted the control, and just as importantly, I wanted her to enjoy the control. There's a big difference between "funishment" and play, and "punishment" though - so be mindful of it and communicate. Good luck!