Re: Looknohands: A fairly ordinary tale of staying locked in

Hi, I’m in my early 40s and have spent the last five nights locked inside a (knock-off) CB6000s, fitted with an official replacement A-ring. I’m noticing some heat on the skin at the back of my scrotum where it rubs against my thighs as I walk. Aside from that, everything is so comfortable it’s hardly noticeable that I have anything on.

The reason for this? Nothing particularly interesting or exotic. There are many branches within the chastity family tree, ranging from wild and outrageous to quite ordinary; mine definitely falls into the latter category:)

I’ve been a compulsive masturbator since around age seven. Usually once or twice daily, sometimes more. I became skilled at self edge-play, keeping myself aroused without crossing over the finish line. Unfortunately, this meant that if I went to bed late or woke up early, there was always time for some fantasy before sleeping, leaving me tired the next day… rinse and repeat.

I had experimented with chastity devices previously, buying a couple of cheap China specials (a birdcage and a tube) from Ebay. The tube was so inexpensive that its solid end jammed in the threads after just a few uses, and because it used hinged padlock fixing, it pinched my skin as it opened and closed with movement. The cage was an improvement but was too large to hide effectively and easy enough for me to pull back out of… It served well alongside bondage play, but wasn’t much use on its own.

So, back to the main point (or rather, what is currently not happening). I’d discussed chastity devices with my wife; she isn’t particularly interested. Certainly not in any of that “chastity porn domina” style we hear so much about. The cage mostly stayed at the bottom of a drawer for occasional self-use over time. Gradually I realized this habit was making me unhappy. It felt like I was cheating on my wife with Madam Palm and her five lovely daughters, so I asked for her help to change that.

The dynamic we have isn’t about punishment or denial; we both agree it makes for a happier household and a better version of me if I stop constantly playing with myself. But what happens when the time comes for my orgasm? The short answer is: there isn’t one fixed date. We aren’t the most active couple in bed right now, so you won’t be reading lurid tales of tongue lashings and all that (which is fine by me). The arrangement is simple: if she wants it unlocked, she unlocks it; if not, it stays locked. Nothing more complex than that.

You have agreed to indefinite denial without a breaking-in period or negotiation? How lucky / terrifying / [insert adjective] for you… It feels natural for us. There’s no need for a calendar with circled dates or a countdown timer. Either I am locked, or I am not. The decision is out of my hands, which works very positively for both of us.

I expect quick 15-minute shave breaks every week or so to prevent rashes and ingrown hairs as much as possible. Beyond that? Who knows? My preference would be moving to a steel device at some point in the future. Partly because I think there might be less friction between polished steel and skin than plastic offers, partly because I’d prefer not having a padlock jiggling around and knocking against the cage, and lastly because a plastic device is basically an honor system promise. If I wanted to, I could snap the pins, jemmy off the padlock or smash the whole thing open. We had an incident a few weeks back during our first trial run with the new kosher A-ring when the cage split along its seam due to particularly vigorous nighttime engorgement. Superglue has fixed that; let’s hope it holds.

I’ve seen the Latowski, as I’m sure everyone else has. I like the front design but am not so keen on the back or any “T” style belts. I know what comes out of my behind occasionally, and the idea of only being able to use the toilet when a shower is available nearby (in case of splatter or smearing) doesn’t appeal to me.

If we do move to steel, it will more likely be something like Mature Metal—much more affordable and easily shipped by post.

Here goes then, post #1 on my journey.

Night 7 now. I'd traded a morning lay-in for my wife against an evening lay-down for me. Possibly my biggest kink is bondage—proper sensory deprivation and restriction stuff that I've enjoyed for years. Last night was fairly straightforward: I went upstairs to get ready, then my wife came up about 15 minutes later to finish the necessary buckles to ensure I couldn't free myself before leaving. No chatting, no discourse, no time limit—exactly what I want. About two hours in and everything was great, except the gag inside the hood started becoming annoying. I have a habit of wanting new experiences, only discovering after trying them that reality isn't quite like the fantasy. I mostly wanted the gag to help block light from entering the hood through my mouth or nose holes (I have an aquiline nose), so I'll need to find another solution in the future. Perhaps I should invest in something more expensive! Anyway, besides the pressure on my teeth, boredom set in. Testing the limits of my confinement, I realized I could turn over onto my front because the tether at my ankles was centered on the bar rather than being one at each end. Like a moth to a flame, I decided to try dry humping the duvet, expecting little sensation. After about 30 seconds, I found myself ridiculously over-excited and managed to drag myself away and roll back onto my back. I was desperate not to orgasm, which is pretty foolish considering what I'd been doing. I clenched everything as hard as possible and willed myself not to go too far; I didn't think it worked: damn, damn, damn. Instantly horrified, annoyed, and humiliated. My wife had given me exactly what I said I wanted, so was this how I repaid her? I lay there for the rest of the time giving myself a good scolding while hoping the mess wouldn't be too obvious when released. As it turned out, barring some minor leakage, I held together well enough. I still felt like an ungrateful idiot though. What this proves is that given the right circumstances, my willpower is weak enough to compromise my supposed contentment with chastity. Any future bondage sessions must remove this level of temptation. A further complication was that somehow overnight one testicle popped back out of the A-ring. I would have thought that impossible given how well the A-ring fitted and its complete inability to be shoved back through easily. I had to ask for the key to fix it, which felt like a failure in itself. All safely locked away again now though. I suppose a journey is meant to teach you lessons...

Last night, into bed and going to re-arrange the cage, I heard a nasty snapping sound:( Presumed it was the pins failing as others had described. Nope. The A-Ring sheared around both pin holes... The irony is that this is the only kosher part of the rig; the CB itself (unbeknownst to me) was a China knock-off with I-beam construction A-rings... So, that's it for now. I felt terrible about snapping it, and my wife also felt bad since she chose the 6000s because she disliked the look of metal. All in all, a pretty miserable night:/ Then today arrived via post: a slightly hopeful China special "steel" pseudo-version of the CB6000. It has a single locking post without the two stabilizers and is squared off to prevent rotating out. Is it actually steel? Well, there are tool marks on it and solder inside, and it feels colder to the touch than previous plated jobs. There is slightly too much play between the lock hole and the cage; initially, this allowed me to slip straight out with a cursory try-on. I've found a small washer now to shim it properly. Hopefully, this will do the job.

Nope, doesn't work... It looks nice enough and the fit isn't bad. The ring wasn't uncomfortable at all; better than the plastic CB one. The problem is that it doesn't prevent ball pull-out, so really useless most of the time, except when I can't get my hands on it quickly. The search continues. I know no device is entirely inescapable and a lot of chastity happens between the ears. There is a certain lower threshold though where my mind asks: "What is the difference between wearing this and not wearing it if a quick pull is enough to make the whole thing fall off?":/

Got the Dremel out tonight and did some careful (as careful as I ever get) grinding to remove some of the shoulder from the mounting bar behind the lock. This closed the gap between the back of the cage and the A-ring enough to fit a second shim washer in place, so I gave it a try. Result: 1 pair of completely trapped balls; they are not going to pop out under any circumstances! Just as I was about to celebrate, a quick rearrangement of my bits led to a backward tug on the skin behind the A-ring and the whole package (sans balls) backed straight out. It isn't working for me. Trying to hold mental chastity together with such little effort required renders the cage useless:( Back to the drawing board I guess.:roll:

I'm a tinkerer in the shop kind of guy and have experimented with some of my own modifications in the past. The bottom line is that I found companies like Mature Metal and Steelworxx have done their R & D well when designing devices. Here's hoping you can come up with the right combination for you.