New arrival seeking friends and a connection

Hi all. I’m posting here for the first time and thrilled to have finally joined this community. My goal is to make some new friends, dive deeper into the lifestyle, and perhaps find my person along the way. Anyway, thanks for reading. Feel free to leave your thoughts. Best, David

Are you certain about sharing so much seemingly accurate personal data online (particularly on a site like this)? > I'm looking to...hopefully meet that special person. This isn't primarily a 'meet-up' platform, so finding someone there is somewhat unlikely. Please avoid soliciting other members for romantic purposes.

I never claimed it was a meet-up site; you can find that special person online, which is all I meant. I haven't solicited anyone. It's amusing to see my first post—a friendly hello—met with you finding flaws and tearing it apart. Thanks, friend.

dbradshaw86, when I first read your post above, I paused to wonder if you were here hoping to connect with a KH. But then I realized it was just a hope for that someone eventually. Twisted and I have been around long enough to spot the occasional new member who joins solely to solicit. Welcome.

Hello and welcome... funny you should say that; I thought the same at first. But then I realized it wasn't so likely because his other comments were quite friendly. It's all good, seriously. We've seen everything here, and sometimes we are quick to remind people this is a place for friendship, support, and encouragement.:) Please ask if you have any questions!

> member_eb10dadf92 wrote:I never said it was a meet up site, you can find that special person online is all im saying. Ive not solicited anyone. > Nice to see my first post which was meant to be a friendly hi to members on here has been greeted with you picking holes in it and pulling it apart. > Thanks buddy It was just advice, and a *polite* request that you avoid soliciting other members for personal meetings. Given your context, this seemed like one of your intentions, so I quoted the relevant part to show how your words could be interpreted that way. That wasn't "picking holes in it and pulling it apart"; I was simply showing you how your message might be perceived. As a moderator, protecting members from unwanted solicitation is part of my job, and it seems best to ensure those who haven't read the Rules ( see the archived discussion ) understand this immediately. I usually give people the benefit of the doubt, so I asked politely rather than just disapproving your post and banning you. I offered you a chance to continue with nothing more than a polite request instead of assuming you were an idiot who needed immediate banishment. However, your snarky reply makes me wonder if my decision was right. I could have simply deleted *that* post and banned you, but I value fairness (mostly unless someone is being completely and obviously difficult). Third time's the charm, isn't it?

> However, your snarky response gives me cause to reconsider whether my decision was correct. I could have just killed *that* post and banned you, but I'm a sucker for fairness (in most cases short of complete and obvious assholitis). Third time's a charm, right? Sounds like someone hasn't been "getting any" lately:D (quite fitting for this forum)

I think we all need a nice cup of tea and somewhere to sit. ... 1008035818

> member_eb10dadf92 wrote:I never said it was a meet up site, you can find that special person online is all im saying. Ive not solicited anyone. > Nice to see my first post which was meant to be a friendly hi to members on here has been greeted with you picking holes in it and pulling it apart. > Thanks buddy Hey DB - please don't take this personally. We've worked hard to make this web board a place where adults can have open, honest conversations without the heavy BDSM baggage that plagues many other boards. Often guys sign up and immediately start sending PMs to the women here, which annoys us. It's just your initial phrasing about meeting a special person online that triggered a few alarms. Hopefully you'll understand and join in the discussions.

Looks like he's been scared away. I hate it when that happens.

> member_b265c134ad wrote:Looks like he's been frightened off. I hate it when that happens. True enough. If Twisted's first post didn't scare him away, the second one probably would have. It almost made *me* walk out myself. Sorry Twisted, but I think you did come on a bit strong. I know we get all sorts here, and as a moderator, your task of keeping undesirables off the site is certainly not easy. Perhaps you saw it differently, but he seemed genuine to me; using his real name in his username was likely enough proof that he was OK. This struck me as a simple misunderstanding (on both sides). As Dukestoy says, "I hate it when that happens". So David, if you are still lurking here, please come out. You're among friends. greengrass

FWIW, I'm solidly on Twisted's side. After a poorly worded first post (if he had posted before I saw it), instead of saying "sorry I worded that badly" to Twisted, he gets "verbal" with a long-standing member and moderator who is acting all "holier than thou." When you're in a new forum, you should have the sense to follow the rules and consider where comments are coming from! As a moderator on an unrelated board myself, I can certainly see it from Twisted's perspective and am 100% with him. Anybody who hasn't been a forum moderator has no idea of the rubbish they sort out for you!! MsM's ld

> member_b195396d43 wrote:Anybody who hasn't been a forum moderator has any idea of the rubbish they sort out for you Image

If you don't mind, I'll steal a copy of that Tom; it's a cracker!! MsM's ld

You can make your own if you're so inclined.

cool thankyou!! MsMs ld