Journals and blogs discussion

Read my intro thread “Oh boy, I hope I know what I am doing…” to see how this began.

A bit about me: I’m a big biker guy. Most people look at me and worry they’ll be murdered or ground into bread by my bones. But inside, I’m usually thinking about Star Wars or Iron Man. My wife of seven years is beautiful, and we have two kids.

Growing up in the family business meant I was always a manager—a role I never really enjoyed. For me, it’s been a pain in the ass. I prefer to work and be left alone. I’ve also always felt a bit submissive in the bedroom.

I think it started with my first girlfriend when I was 21 and still a virgin; she was 19 and far from it. When we finally had sex, she made me eat what came after her. This was back in the early 90s (I’m 46 now), and I hadn’t really thought about such things before, but it was her kink. She loved kissing me after a blowjob, having me cum on her breasts or butt so she could lick it off, of course eating many creampies along with them. I got used to it. She would call and whisper into the phone about what we’d do that night, hoping I was hungry. We were together for only a year (I think once I was broken in, I stopped being fun), but the kink stayed. Some girls liked it; others didn’t care at all. My wife now is okay with it. She knows it’s my thing and plays along.

Cut to today. My wife isn’t particularly dominant or submissive; she likes sex once in a while, though not quite on my level. I can have sex three times a day and then jerk off several more times after that. A normal day starts with me masturbating one to three times in the morning after my wife leaves for work. On weekends we usually have sex twice, maybe just once—it depends. About two years ago, while looking at creampie porn, I noticed a cock cage and was immediately curious. After a few days of googling, I knew I wanted to be caged. But I worried about how my wife would react. I buried that fear in the back of my head and moved on.

More recently, I’ve been gaining weight and dealing with low moods. I haven’t felt very sexy lately, and our sex life was starting to feel like a chore. If I sense she isn’t into it, I can’t climax, so many sessions end with me jerking off myself. Finally, I decided to broach the subject with my wife.

So, with my heart pounding, I sent her this email:

First off, I love you—so much it sometimes hurts. There’s something I want to discuss tonight. You’ll likely have questions and think it’s weird, but I want to talk about getting me a chastity device.

I need to release some control to you so that I don’t feel as anxious or pressured regarding our sex life. It feels like I live two separate lives: one when you’re here, and another when you’re not, which makes me feel bad. I just want you—only you. You’ve always been great about trying new things; please know I appreciate it. This involves quite a bit more than usual, requiring you to take the lead a little. If it’s okay with you, I’d love for you to get totally naked and cuddle with me so we can talk tonight.

If you say “No, I’m not into this,” that is perfectly fine because it only works if we do it together. I love you. You can text me a response; I just didn’t want the preview to show on your screen.

She texted back saying we could talk about it that night. She wasn’t sure I could handle chastity, thinking “You’ll explode,” and worried I’d be cranky all the time. I told her I thought it would help me relax and stop worrying about whether she was into sex at any given moment since our encounters would only happen when she allowed them. She said we could give it a try, then asked if I wanted an orgasam? I came on her breasts and cleaned her with my tongue before cuddling to sleep.

Next chapter: Amazon One Day Shipping.

Amazon is amazing. I had already done my research. When I asked if my wife would like to help me pick out a cage, she gave me a raised eyebrow and a firm "No." So I was on my own. I chose a Rikers device for $65; it had good overall reviews seemed like a reasonable compromise compared to the more expensive CB6k. When I saw the message that the item could be delivered by 9pm today for Prime members, I was sold! *CLICK* chastity cage on its way. [photo=medium]18915[/photo] Well, it showed up at 8pm. We put the kids to bed and took a look. Wife: Well, that's definitely something alright. Is it going to fit you? Me: I think so; I used a string to measure my balls and penis while soft. Wife: Go put it on and let's have a look then. Into the bathroom I went. I've always considered myself fairly average in the penis department, but apparently, I am slightly plus-size. After much grunting and struggling, I wasn't getting anywhere. My wife came in to see what was happening JUST as one of the sharp edges of the ring pinched my sack, suddenly BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!! She decided she was done for the night. Disappointed and sad, I cleaned up and went to bed. She gave me a reassuring pat on the butt and told me to find a larger size so we could try again. At 2am, I woke up again and decided to give it another go. I managed to get it on, only to discover my right nut wouldn't stay in place. [photo=medium]18916[/photo] That won't work! After fiddling around for a bit, I got both nuts inside with no blood... [photo=medium]18922[/photo] I had to work that day (Saturday shift of six hours), so I decided to wear it. OUCH! This thing ground on me everywhere. By the end of my drive home, I was done for. My wife went to unlock me and looked at my balls which were bright red, saying "No. This is too small baby. You're not wearing this one again." Well, that sucks. So back to more research! **Next up: I invest in Chinese Steel**

Awesome that she's on board and worried about proper fit. I'm amazed you still tried after the blood! Play it safe, man, but remember: once you find a good fit, you asked for this!