Wanted · London · Women who lead
Eight years on the other side, five months on this one
- Wants
- somebody experienced enough to tell me when I have missed something
- Experience
- Eight years submissive. Five months leading, all of it careful.
- Around
- the east, London
I spent eight years submitting to other people and was perfectly happy there. Then a friend asked me to run something for her because nobody else would, and I did, and something rearranged itself that afternoon which has not gone back.
Five months on I am fairly certain this is where I belong. I am also aware that five months is nothing and I am not going to claim a competence I have not earned.
Thirty three, the east. What I have that most new dominant women do not is eight years of knowing precisely what it feels like when somebody gets this wrong from underneath. I know what a lazy check in sounds like. I know the particular silence of a person who stopped enjoying something twenty minutes ago and does not want to spoil the evening. I noticed those things for years and I notice them now, from the other chair.
What I want is one man to go slowly with who understands exactly what he is joining. Somebody with a few years behind him would suit me better than a beginner, because I would rather be with a person who can say plainly that I have missed something than one who assumes I meant it.
I am not looking for anybody who wants a finished article, and I am not looking to be told this makes me a switch. I have been asked that three times. I have changed chairs. I have not split in two.
Where this one puts you on the route
If you read this one twice, you are at stage four whether you meant to arrive there or not. Nearly everything that goes wrong from here goes wrong in the first message.
- 04 Read her stated instructions before you write a word
- 04 Writing the first message, with two short ones in full
- 04 The seven openers that get deleted unread
Also in London
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My replies take a fortnight and that is the point of them
Wants: a man who can wait without asking whether I got his message
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Nothing about my limits is interesting and all of it is final
Wants: a man who reads a limit as a limit
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I will tell you exactly what makes me open the second message
Wants: one man who has read something and can answer a question
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I counted March: forty two letters, three worth answering
Wants: somebody in the small pile rather than the large one